Floating through this life
That sometimes seems
Endlessly surreal
Trying to chase
The wasted dreams
I can no longer feel.
For once I must beckon myself
Back into the world
From which I came
And not slip into the clutches
Of Lust’s twisted game.
But Time keeps passing by
Like a stranger in the street
With curiosity I listen closely
Following the sounds of its feet
Until suddenly it disappears
And I’m left meandering
Alone
Wondering, forever wondering
If my love will ever come back home.
It is already too late;
The chorus has played its part
Now gather all your belongings
And fold away that melancholy harp
This tragedy has outstayed its welcome
Please advise for it to leave;
Take all the mourners with you
And in another place they can grieve
For too long has this sorrow
Taken up residency;
It’s time the uninvited guest
Bid farewell
To the lady
That bore presidency
And made what was little heavenly
A little hell
Oh how I long for those days
Where we are but momentarily united!
I’d no longer gaze down despairingly
At our separation and fight it
Or wonder at how
My connection to you vanished
Not much later than it started
Without even a word
From our once adoring spectators
Who then departed
Oh yes, I’d seize the moment
With all my might,
Eradicating any existence
Of so wretched a respite
And turn to you
With so loving a gaze as before
And cry beseechingly:
“Don’t you understand…?
It is your love I implore!”
But the lady doth pity win;
Turning my love for her into anger
Would be turning myself to sin
And so I must carry
My heavy heart
Such as raw flesh on a plate
Believing in the cause
Of a love revival
That I hope won’t arrive
Too late.
This is the path I have been given
This is the chorus meant for singing
Nobody figures out their own fate;
we only hope we can carve out a way
to Heaven’s gate.
For the path we walk is a crumbled mess,
trodden on hopelessly by the rest.
If this life is just singular and mortal,
then we have lied to ourselves
in thinking there were many portals.
But there can only be one way
to the wretched grave;
it is how we choose to spend it
that gives us our name.
If we choose it wisely,
why should we fear to die?
The old learn to embrace
Death’s precipice daily;
breathing out life
is nothing more than a sigh.
In the end it is all a matter of time;
there are no lessons in learning how to die.
With nothing to look back or forward to
The eyes that were once dry are now filled with weeping…
How can I let go of the sorrow and pain I’ve been keeping?
My tears are wet and salty
I can only hope they are washing out whatever was inside
Will you dry my eyes?
My face is wet from the tears that came streaming
And somehow I knew it was coming.
All the emotions came flooding in and took hold of me
I could do nothing to stop them from rushing out.
It all just came rushing out.
We exchanged stories
in the heat of the sunshine,
allowing our memories to unfold
and rewind time.
The past we shared never gets old
like an ancient myth forever told
How we braced every moment with its each component;
our youthful nature always gave us away
– even when we had nothing to say.
And how neatly it all fell into place!
Even still our friendship is strong enough
to withstand Time’s race.
But Time has changed us through and through;
now when I look into your eyes I see a less innocent you…
The world may have made its mark
but I still see that old spark of years gone by.
Let us revert back
To how we used to be;
A time where I was young,
Innocent and carefree
For now there just seems
Too much trouble in the air;
The forecast is reflected
In the weight of my stare
Who ever knew that our
Love would come crashing
Down to the ground?
We were so blissful
And contented; in truth
We were spellbound
And yet it seems there are
Still more rainy days to come
Since Misery tapped on my door
And blotted out the sun
She took away my angel,
My lover, my bride…
Some days I question
Whether or not I will survive
For she was my world
And seized onto my heart with such a grasp;
We never even thought to question
Whether our love would last.
I am still ill at ease and confounded when I realise that you’re gone
If only I could lessen the gap on the things that separate;
Our cultures and geographies are dissimilar –
There is not much upon which we can relate.
Yet I do not fear, for I know that love alone will draw us near
It is the only thing, of which I have ever been certain,
The only thing on which I can rely,
When love finally decides to close the curtain,
That will be the day I die.
Her soul is gone from that house…
She no longer resides there
And so I must forget it and be quick to move on,
Or else leave sad traces lingering of what was left there
Her presence has now deserted it,
But I will still hold onto the memories
Of what we shared there
Facing up to absence is painful,
But realising that her presence was there
And yet still lives gives me the hope
I need to carry on.
And so it has all ended
The page is waiting to be turned,
New experiences are yet to be learned
The leaf still waits to be overturned to
Its other side, its better side…
Yet I am still in the process of fixing
Together the fragments of my life
But the pieces are such complex shapes
And their edges cut like knives
If only I could see the journey of my life
From beginning to end;
Perhaps then my wounds would have
Hope to mend
Yet whether my future is bright and hopeful
Is something only some might say
For all we know, the path could be
Treacherous, leading me to decay
Catherine Lucy Rowland 