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History of Lovers

You’ve locked me

Into your embrace again;

I’m Daniel in the lion’s den.

 

Just as I was a stone’s throw away

From throwing us away

You opened up your arms of love

And begged me to stay

 

Was it a lifeline

Or a noose with which

To hang my neck?

Are we on board this ship

Or just a sinking wreck?

 

Because this sinking

Started long ago

I chose to hold on

As the miraculous survivor;

Looked upon our love

And tried to revive her

 

When all that remained

Were fragments of disarray:

A history of lovers,

Unwilling to leave

And yet unwilling to stay.

 

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Purgatorial Love

Placed in purgatory

I created a world

Undeniably mine

Fit to foster all my

Aspects that collide

 

Looking inward

Like concave mirror reflections

I saw an apparition of my soul

With neither love nor affection;

I became a shadow

That fleets and deceives

Standing under the light that perceives

 

But now days bleed

And I let myself sink

Into your world

Where rising sorrows

Entwine and unfurl

And I become lost again.

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Loving You Awry

Like lovers passing out

In a romantic trance

We paved the streets of London

In a carefree dance

 

Unperturbed by the world

We mistakenly offend

Driven forward by a force

With which it cannot contend

 

Wherein this snow globe

We are each other’s muses

And paint the sky in flakes of feeling

A love infused only with dreaming

 

Until with my white and frozen

Lips you bade me goodbye

Whilst I continue earnestly now

Loving you awry…

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A Pledge With Death

(You wish for something

To appease your thoughts

But searching your mind,

You find nought…)

 

Oh sweet duplicity of intent

That falters my conscience;

Some might say

My actions were hell-bent…

 

But what may be this

Mysterious manifestation

That drives its fettered stream?

Upon reflection, I think

It was a dream…

 

Even now as my

Sprightly spirit returns

I start to remember

The Love for which I have yearned…

 

And even as Death mingles

Around her edges, I am quite positive

My pledges will not be burned…

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A Beautiful Burden

The light reflects onto your face

And into your searching eyes;

When you look in the mirror

Do you find something you despise?

 

Amidst your wandering gaze

Which hangs heavy with your lashes

Inside I see a soul that carries

A burden your beautiful face matches

 

Might it have been love

That carried me into your arms

Or was it my lack of resistance

For your insatiable charm?

 

The longing to pour into you

My soul whilst resting

My weary head against your shoulder

My feelings for you are unadulterated;

What concern is it that you are older?

 

For in matters of the heart

My single most preoccupation is clear:

To love you unreservedly;

You are my queen and I am your seer

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Direction To The Heart

Threads of sincerity entwined with curiosity

Leading me down a haunted road

Pointing in the direction of your heart

Where I have decided to make my home

 

Please don’t think me crude

For I have not taken your tenderness for granted

Yet the cause for cessation is too late

As the seeds of love have already been planted…

 

Into my veins whilst I lay softly asleep;

Was it Cupid’s arrow that pierced me

Or a love bug’s venomous bite

From which I will reap?

 

Whatever it may be is

Swimming beneath the surface of my skin

Awakening my mind to the sensations

That lay subdued therein

 

Waiting, ever waiting

For the sweetness that causes

Love again to be revived

The sweetness without which

I do not think I could survive

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You Are A Hangover That Never Leaves

You are a hangover that never leaves

A throbbing pain inside of me

I wake to its presence unceasingly,

The sorrow just never seems to end.

I long for these wounds to heal

But you are preventing them to mend

 

And yet, I sense that you have not a care.

In your disappointment with me

You denied everything that was there.

 

But let me plead with you and ask you,

How were we to carry on?

When you have no understanding of

The things you did wrong?

 

And so I shouldered your blame

Like it was mine to bear,

Until I realised I had no fault

But it was you who was unaware…

 

Now I have so little to say

Because the pain is just too much;

When everybody is asking

The same questions,

Oh how easily I get fed up!

 

Each to their own matter and each

Will claim theirs is more important

How eagerly we spill out our words

As if we wished to be rewarded!

 

To the least of this I plead

A guilty charge

I fought my battle to the bitter end

But it was the end that caught me

Off guard

 

Now I have poured out all I have to give

I wonder what energy is there

Or motivation to live?

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Worldly Love


World-weariness causing

My heart to wear away

Pretending I’m not hurt

By the things that you say

Seeking to protect myself

At all costs, but considering

A world without you,

I’d count it a loss

The motivation is gone

When you are not there

Before I was predictable,

reliable…

But now I struggle to

Find a reason to care.

Looking into your eyes

Is where I find some sense within

You’re breaking down

These walls that are paper-thin

Hands that reach in to touch my heart;

Be careful or you’ll light a spark that will

Always remain ablaze

Rather, speak to me and nurture me

Gently with your loving caress

That takes the pain away

Love me, don’t use me,

Or else I will find somewhere

Else to stay.

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Who Would Have Thought?

Who would have thought this

Was going to get worse?

And yet I suffer silently

In my dreaming

 

Your bittersweet presence

Appears before me as clear as day

I ask you what went wrong and

Why you had nothing to say

 

Even fighting through my tears

I beg for reconciliation

And then your loving touch

Floats over me;

That warm appreciation.

 

I cuddle you back, even more

Readily than before

This distance that has crept

Between us makes me

Love you all the more.

 

And yet I know that you being

Here is nothing but a vision…

I wake to the morning light

Feeling that something

Is missing.

 

This loss of you has left me

Traumatised; nothing more

Nothing less.

Even to the extent where

The motivation to live has

Left me and the desire to dream

Is best.

 

I long to crawl back into this

Sphere of subconsciousness,

Return to the womb.

I’m not ready for this

Heartbreak; it is all happening too soon.

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Too Involved With You

I am too involved with you to let you go

Life is too short to ignore the people that matter

In an instant the flame can be extinguished,

Leaving absence where there was once substance.

 

In the same way I cannot pretend to have

No knowledge of you;

It would be careless and cruel,

Making it seem as if I want nothing from you

When I do want something…

 

For you have made the greatest

Impression upon me that can never ever leave

It keeps me awake at night holding me back from sleep

 

Your presence returns to me

Like a sweet perfume wafting through the air

I start to remember your every move, word and stare.

 

So you leaving me is impossible,

Although reality begs to differ

We are bonded and thus you carry me thither

Carry me to that safe place far from home

Carry me there for I no longer want to be alone.