Who would have thought this

Was going to get worse?

And yet I suffer silently

In my dreaming

 

Your bittersweet presence

Appears before me as clear as day

I ask you what went wrong and

Why you had nothing to say

 

Even fighting through my tears

I beg for reconciliation

And then your loving touch

Floats over me;

That warm appreciation.

 

I cuddle you back, even more

Readily than before

This distance that has crept

Between us makes me

Love you all the more.

 

And yet I know that you being

Here is nothing but a vision…

I wake to the morning light

Feeling that something

Is missing.

 

This loss of you has left me

Traumatised; nothing more

Nothing less.

Even to the extent where

The motivation to live has

Left me and the desire to dream

Is best.

 

I long to crawl back into this

Sphere of subconsciousness,

Return to the womb.

I’m not ready for this

Heartbreak; it is all happening too soon.